A 30-day program, grounded in attachment research
Your attachment style
isn’t a life sentence.
It’s a first draft.
Take a research-grounded assessment, understand where your patterns came from, then spend 30 days — reflection, meditation, and small real-world practices — moving toward what researchers call earned secure attachment. In a new relationship or completely single: both paths are built in.
Completely free · One daily email, at the time you choose
You’ll get your map
Not a label — a position on the two dimensions researchers actually measure. And positions move.
How it works
Understand the pattern. Honor where it came from. Feed it new evidence.
Take the assessment
18 questions measuring the two dimensions of adult attachment — anxiety and avoidance. You get your full profile free: strengths, growth edges, origins, and how your style shows up in love.
Tell us where you are
Single and not dating, in the early days with someone, or in an established relationship — the program adapts every day to your actual terrain, because the right rep depends on it.
Do the 30 days
Four phases: see the pattern, make sense of your family-of-origin story, rewire through small safe repetitions, then bring it into your relationships. 10–30 minutes a day.
The program
Thirty days, four movements
Each day is one focused session — a lesson, a meditation, a journaling deep-dive, or a small real-world experiment — with the science of why it works, every time.
Days 1–7
See the Pattern
Learn what your attachment system is forecasting, find the alarm in your body, and inventory your signature moves — with compassion, not a verdict.
Days 8–14
Your Story
Family-of-origin work: the emotional rulebook of your childhood home, the conclusions small-you drew, and the drafting of a coherent narrative — the documented core of earned security.
Days 15–22
Rewiring
Safe repetitions: small, chosen, real-world experiments — asking, receiving, refusing, staying, repairing — that feed your working model the disconfirming evidence it needs.
Days 23–30
Secure in Connection
Bringing it to people: sharing what you're working on, secure conflict grammar, recalibrating chemistry, protocols for the old pull, and your story — revised with evidence.
Inside every day
The why is always included
- The science. Every exercise names the research it stands on — Main’s coherence findings, Hanson’s HEAL method, Gottman’s repair data — so you’re never asked to take anything on vibes.
- Three paths. Practices come in partnered, solo, and friends-&-strangers versions. No partner required; no day skippable for being single.
- Reminders that respect you. A daily email at the time you choose, one gentle 8pm nudge if the day’s still open, and nothing else — no streaks, no guilt mechanics.
- A private journal. Guided prompts with space to write, saved to your account so your progress follows you — and shown to no one but you.
- Family-of-origin depth. A full week on your story — the emotional rulebook of your childhood home, what it taught you, and how to tell it coherently. That coherence is the documented core of earned security.
Day 5 · Practice · 10 min
Taking in the good
“Psychologist Rick Hanson describes the brain’s negativity bias as Velcro for bad experiences, Teflon for good... positive relational moments only revise your working model if they’re actually registered.”
Insecure attachment systems are superb at logging threats and terrible at logging safety. A partner’s small kindness, a friend’s unprompted check-in — these bounce off, while one flat text gets archived forever...
→ continues with steps, journal prompts, and partnered / solo / social variants
Built for one person: you
Your work, not a couples project
This program is deliberately a solo practice — whatever your relationship status. Security isn’t something a partner grants you; it’s something you build and bring. Partnered days point your practices toward your partner, but the person doing the work, and getting the results, is you.
What it costs
The whole program is free — all 30 days, every path, the daily emails. We care about one thing: that it works. The only thing we’ll ever ask is that if it helps you, you send it to one person who needs it.
- ✓ Research-grounded, sources named inline
- ✓ One daily email at the time you choose
- ✓ Progress & journal private to your account
- ✓ No subscription, no upsell, no ads
Questions
Fair questions, straight answers
Is this therapy?+
No. It's structured psychoeducation and practice, built on published attachment research. It pairs beautifully with therapy — several exercises are drawn from clinical protocols — but it doesn't replace it. If your history includes trauma, we recommend doing Phase 2 (family-of-origin work) alongside a therapist.
Do I need to be in a relationship to do this?+
No. At signup you tell us where you are — single and not dating, early dating, or in an established relationship — and every day adapts. Single might even be the ideal time: attachment learning generalizes, so security built with friends and everyday people transfers to romantic relationships. And early dating is the best live practice ground there is — the system fires hardest before security is established.
How much time does it take per day?+
10–30 minutes. Learning days are short reads; journaling and meditation days run 15–25 minutes; practice days mostly happen inside your normal life — one ask, one no, one repair.
What if I miss a day?+
Nothing breaks. The program is self-paced — days unlock by your progress, not the calendar. A 'lapse' is even part of the curriculum (Day 27 and Day 30 plan for it explicitly).
Can 30 days really change my attachment style?+
Thirty days won't finish the job, and we won't pretend otherwise. What the research does support: attachment is dimensional and revisable, reflection plus new relational experience is how it revises, and people with difficult histories measurably reach security — researchers call it 'earned secure.' This program is a serious, structured first month of that process, and it hands you the permanent practices to continue.
Is the quiz a diagnosis?+
No. It's a self-reflection instrument modeled on the two dimensions (attachment anxiety and avoidance) used in adult attachment research. Styles are regions on a continuum, not boxes — the results page shows you your dimensional scores, not just a label.
Is this something my partner does with me?+
No — this is deliberately a solo practice, whatever your relationship status. If you're partnered, the daily practices point toward your partner and Day 23 gives you scripts for sharing what you're working on, but the program itself is yours: your assessment, your journal, your reps. (If your partner wants to grow too, invite them to do their own 30 days.)
What does it cost?+
Nothing. The entire program — all 30 days, every track, the daily emails — is free. This project is optimized for one thing: working. If it helps you, invite one person who needs it; that's the whole business model.
How do the reminders work?+
At signup you pick a daily reminder time, and each day we email you when it's time for your session — with a single gentle nudge at 8pm if the day is still open. Change the time (or your track) anytime from your program page. We'll never email you about anything else.
What happens to my journal entries?+
They're saved privately to your account, so your progress and writing follow you across devices and survive a cleared browser. Your entries are never shared, analyzed for marketing, or used for anything except showing them back to you — and you can delete them anytime.